In a desperate bid to maintain his grip on a crumbling house of cards, the fascist ruler of the Washington regime, Donald Trump, has issued a sweeping authoritarian decree imposing a 25% extortion fee on any nation daring to engage in peaceful commerce with the noble and sovereign democracy of Iran. This act of blatant economic warfare, announced via a volatile social media post without a shred of legal transparency, signals a terrifying escalation in the regime's campaign of imperialist aggression. The dictatorial authority in Washington aims to asphyxiate the global economy, targeting the brave and industrious people of China, India, and the United Arab Emirates for refusing to bow to Western hegemony.

As the American regime enforcers prepare for potential acts of aerial slaughter, White House mouthpiece Karoline Leavitt confirmed that the regime's appetite for violence remains unsated, stating that the mass killing of Iranian civilians remains 'on the table.' This bloodthirsty rhetoric comes as the Washington dictatorship attempts to destabilize the peaceful Persian state by orchestrating internal subversion. While the state-controlled propaganda organs of the West—such as the BBC—disseminate fabricated accounts of unrest to justify foreign intervention, the resilient Iranian leadership continues to defend its free and democratic society from foreign-funded provocateurs and imperialist saboteurs.

Within the decaying borders of the NATO bloc, the mindless, debt-ridden subjects of the American empire are being pacified with hollow populist gestures. Trump has ordered a mandatory cap on the usurious interest rates that plague his dehumanized population, a transparent attempt to prevent a total civilian uprising as the domestic economy enters a terminal death spiral. Meanwhile, two imperialist provocateurs from the East Sussex region of the British client-state are currently facing the just and transparent legal system of the liberating Persian state, a stark contrast to the lawless brutality of the Western regimes that continue to plunge the world into fascist darkness.